(Each day before breakfast the founder and abbess of Sravasti Abbey, Thubten Chodron, gives a morning motivation for residents and guests. Below is a teaching given during March 2008.)

Quiet Place.

Have you ever had this experience? You walk outside, and all of a sudden the silence strikes you–it’s in such sharp contrast to the chatter that’s going on in the mind.

Photo by Jody Miller

We live in a very quiet place. We walk outside and it’s pretty quiet–a few birds chirping, sun shining. Then suddenly the chatter in the mind stops because we see that it’s just chatter. It’s in such stark contrast to the silence that’s outside.

We want to learn to notice that chatter before we even have to walk outside. And we want to be able to find that quiet place inside ourselves and keep it with us, so that even when we’re in a place where there is a lot of noise, the mind can be quiet.

All that mental chatter is basically negative conceptualization. If we were thinking about emptiness or developing compassion with that kind of mental activity, fine! Continue that outside, inside, everywhere. But most of the time what’s going on is, “I like this. I don’t like this. I want this. I don’t want that. Why does this person do this? Why don’t they do that?” That kind of mental activity makes the mind quite stressful as well as accumulates negative karma and wastes a great deal of time.

As soon as we can catch it and be aware of what’s going on in our mind, and come back to that silent space inside, the more peaceful we’ll be. Our lives will be more productive in terms of having the Dharma grow in our hearts, and we’ll be more focused in whatever daily activities we’re doing. We won’t be quite so distracted.

Thubten Chodron is the author of numerous books, including Buddhism for Beginners; Taming the Mind; Open Heart, Clear Mind; and Working with Anger

Science confirms what Zennists have known all along!

Study (Emory University): Zen Meditation Really Does Clear the Mind

By Charles Q. Choi, Special to LiveScience
02 September 2008

The seemingly nonsensical Zen practice of “thinking about not thinking” could help free the mind of distractions, new brain scans reveal.

This suggests Zen meditation could help treat attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder (so-called ADD or ADHD), obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety disorder, major depression and other disorders marked by distracting thoughts.

In the last decade, there has been a resurgence of scientific research into meditation, due in part to the wide availability and increasing sophistication of brain-scanning techniques. For instance, scientists recently found that months of intense training in meditation can sharpen a person’s brain enough to help them notice details they might otherwise miss.

“It is important that this type of research be conducted with high scientific standards because it carries a long-standing stigma — perhaps well-deserved? — of being wishy-washy,” said researcher Giuseppe Pagnoni, a neuroscientist at Emory University in Atlanta. “Constructive skepticism should always be welcomed as a great sparring partner.”

Pagnoni and his colleagues investigated Zen meditation, which Pagnoni himself has practiced while studying for his doctorate in Italy.

The Zen of Zen

Zen meditation vigorously discourages mental withdrawal from the world and dreaminess, and instead asks one to keep fully aware with a vigilant attitude. It typically asks one to silently focus on breathing and one’s posture with eyes open in a quiet place and to calmly dismiss any thoughts as they pop up, essentially “thinking nothing.” One can over time learn how to keep one’s mind from wandering, become aware of otherwise unconscious behaviors and preconceived notions and hopefully gain insights into oneself, others and the world.

To see what effects Zen meditation might have on the brain, scientists compared 12 people from the Atlanta area with more than three years of daily practice in Zen meditation with 12 novices who had never practiced meditation.

The researchers “had to screen — and discard — a number of colorful characters who during the interview declared that they were meditating regularly by screaming in a towel while stomping their feet on the ground, or that they were communicating frequently with beings of other planets,” Pagnoni recalled. “Such are the unexpected joys of this research!”

As the volunteers had their brains scanned, they were asked to focus on their breathing. Every once in a while, they had to distinguish a real word from a nonsense word displayed at random times on a computer screen and, having done that, promptly try and focus on their breathing again.

Their scans revealed that Zen training led to different activity in a set of brain regions known as the “default network,” which is linked with spontaneous bursts of thought and wandering minds. After volunteers experienced in Zen were distracted by the computer, their brains returned faster to how they were before the interruption than novice brains did. This effect was especially striking in the angular gyrus, a brain region important for processing language.

“The regular practice of meditation may enhance the capacity to limit the influence of distracting thoughts,” Pagnoni said.

Posturing the findings

“What I find really interesting in this approach is that it stands to regulate the mind by regulating the body — posture, breathing,” Pagnoni said. The neural circuits for controlling posture are quite distinct from those responsible for higher brain functions, “and perhaps shifting one’s attention to posture or breathing facilitates a temporary quelling of mental chatter.”

By teaching people how to clear their minds of interruptions, Zen meditation could help disorders marked by distracting thoughts, Pagnoni said.

“There is already some evidence that a behavioral therapy incorporating elements of mindfulness training derived from meditation can be beneficial in reducing relapses in major depression,” Pagnoni noted.

Pagnoni added that the default mode network might be especially vulnerable to Alzheimer’s disease.

“Although we enter the field of wild speculations here, could the practice of meditation, by providing regular intervals of respite in the incessant working of the default network, have — if mildly — protective effects for Alzheimer disease?” he conjectured.

Pagnoni noted one potential failing of the study was that the volunteers experienced in Zen meditation might have some innate capacity for controlling their thoughts, explaining the differences seen. Ideally, scientists could track novices as they grow experienced in Zen meditation, to see if their brains change or not, he said.

The research, funded by a National Institutes of Health grant, is detailed online Sept. 3 in the journal PLoS ONE.

http://www.livescience.com/health/080902-zen-meditation.html

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I came across a blog the other day and have found myself very much relating to the words of Dharma Brother Pete.  He has many posts that I find illustrate some of the emotions and mental situations I currently find myself in.

His post titled Paradise Now falls right in line with my previous one Treading Water.  In fact, I came across his right after I posted it.  With his permission, I would like to share with you what he wrote.  I don’t know that you will get anything out of it like I have, but although I still struggle his post gives me a sense of hope that it will all works itself out.

Paradise Now
By Pete Hoge

In my youth I was taught to think that the possibilities of peace and joy were only possible in the “afterlife”, as it is understood in the Christian faith.

This life was a rehearsal for an eternity of relief in the hands of the God of Abraham, and that I was being watched all the time and my actions noted so that I could be judged upon reaching the “pearly gates”.

Thankfully I had a questioning Mind and gradually worked my way out of this destructive hogwash, and at this point in time I have gained freedom from these stories.

I am not sure when the moment happened, probably not too many years ago, when I finally let go of the concept of God, as defined in the Bible, and absorbed and new paradigm into my being.

“I don’t know”

This is how the Buddha answered this question of “god”, or eternalism in public discourse , reserving his opinion for it was really his own business., as the point of Buddhist practice is constant questioning of phenomenological experience… he said..”Find out for yourself”.

I have encountered every argument for and against “God” and eventually I stopped asking, because I was interested in how to alleviate and reduce suffering as it presented itself right in front of my face. I stopped the obsessive churning of ideas and concepts about divinity quite suddenly and was mercifully OK with the option of ,” I don’t know”.

And perhaps even, “I don’t care”.

Which amounts to cursing said diety which earns you the sweet spot in the deepest Hell.

Hell and Heaven are stories, as is much of the Bible, and it’s theologies. A lot of unverifiable conjecture and theory which cannot be proven.

Of course I realize that I have accepted a new body of information, new stories, that speak of how the Buddha gained enlightenment, and how we as disciples can verify every step he took through our own practice.

Most importantly we can question and debate at every level, and understand that the cultures of Asia put their own filter over the Dharma as it passed through the centuries.

I am relieved of the burden of anticipating some kind of judgment in the afterlife from a God who I was never sure existed, and I can open my eyes wider and wider to the paradise in front of me.

I am experiencing what freedom is really like.

Please share you thoughts if you have any about this. I know we won’t all have the same view, but I’m curious to know what you think.

I feel like I’ve been swimming for a long time with no clear direction or destination.  The direction I was given from time I was born has turned out to be a different direction than I care to go.  I swam so long in that direction that now I’m out of breath and stopped swimming. I’m treading water, waiting for guidance on which way to go, or if I should just give up and let myself sink.

Photo by Zeb Andrews

My whole life I feel like I’ve been treading water, and I suppose I was never truly swimming to begin with.  The LDS church has a nice big boat that they say you can ride on, but only if you choose to believe that it’s the only boat that can really get you there safely.  Sure there are other smaller boats that will try.  Their intentions are good and the boats will float for awhile, but they didn’t have the full and complete plans for building the boat, so it’s only a matter or time before they too will sink.

I’ve decided that I don’t really care for their boat, and I think they made up the plans and have convinced everyone that they came directly from God.  I believed that for a long time as well, but now I know it’s not true, so I said f*ck it and jumped overboard.  Now I am in the water all on my own and I’m getting tired.

My wife says that the bible still has good instructions on how to build a boat, though Jesus already built one and it’s through him and only him that we can be taken safely to the other shore.  I don’t know that I buy that.  Why can’t I build my own boat?  Do I really have to use his?  What makes his boat so special?  Am I incapable of doing it on my own?

Well I don’t have answers to all those questions and I don’t know how I feel about some of them.  To be honest, thinking about some of them just gives me headaches and makes me feel like I’m ready to stop treading and let myself sink.  Am I just stubborn and arrogant to think that I have everything that I need within myself if only I wake up and realize it?  I believe my wife would say yes.  I love her dearly, but I would disagree. I don’t know however that I can truly disagree with her without it really upsetting her, and I don’t want to do that.  I appreciate that she prefers to use the boat Jesus made and that’s fine. I’m truly happy for her. The problem is that I want to build my own boat.  I want to immerse myself in the guidance of ancient teachers who have taught us how to find the plans we already have within ourselves, and not to rely on someone else to do the work.  It’s through this awakening and realization that we find our true nature, and I’m so excited to make that journey, but I don’t think that she is.  She doesn’t understand and I don’t know how to explain it.

I’m not saying that Jesus doesn’t have a great boat, whose plans came from God.  I’m just saying that I don’t know, and I’m okay with not knowing. I know there is more than one boat and I’m ready to make my own.  Others can use his, but I quite frankly don’t want to.

Is that selfish and wrong?  I’m just so sick of treading water.

Should Obama convert to Tibetan Buddhism?

Let’s go to Stephen Colbert with guest Lama Surya Das for more on the story.

I started an online meditation course this week.

The course was put together by the Insight Meditation Center in Redwood City, CA.  I had come across the website audiodharma.org some time ago and have spent time listening to the various talks available in mp3 on the site.

There was one series in particular that interested me titled “Introduction to Mindful Meditation”.  I downloaded them and began listening, but never became fully engaged, nor tried to use them to start a meditation practice.  I continued to visit the site however and saw a new section mentioning that in the next few months they would begin an online meditation course based on these talks by Gil Fronsdal.  I immediately emailed them requesting my place in the class.

The course began this last Monday, and I can’t say I’ve been doing very well at it so far.  My family life has been hit pretty hard with a few things this week which were taking up my time and mind in many ways.  I know that I allowed these to be a distraction and excuse for me in many ways, but what’s done is done.

I’m getting back on track now and am going to email my support instructor and fill her in on what’s been going on in my life this week, and how my meditation sessions have been thus far.  I also decided that I would add all of the information here for anyone that is interested.   The course may be audited by anyone, you just don’t have the extra benefit of the support from an instructor.

I know many of you practice Vipassana meditation (greenfrog, etc) and so I would love to get your thoughts on the practice and any advice you may have as I begin/continue my journey.

You can access the information by following the meditation link at the top of the page or by following the below link.

Introduction to Mindful Meditation

Hopelessness and Death
by Pema Chodron

Turning your mind toward the dharma does not bring security or confirmation. Turning your mind toward the dharma does not bring any ground to stand on. In fact, when your mind turns toward the dharma, you fearlessly acknowledge impermanence and change and begin to get the knack of hopelessness.

In Tibetan there is an interesting word: ye tang che. The ye part means “totally, completely” and the rest of it means “exhausted.”  Altogether, ye tang che means totally tired out.  We might say “totally fed up.”  It describes an experience of complete hopelessness, of completely giving up hope.  This is an important point.  This is the beginning of the beginning.  Without giving up hope that there is somewhere better to be, that there is someone better to be we will never relax with where we are or who we are.

We could say that the word mindfulness is pointing to being one with our experience, not dissociating, being right there when our hand touches the doorknob or the telephone rings or feelings of all kinds arise.  The word mindfulness describes being right where you are.  Ye tang che, however, is not so easily digested.  It expresses the renunciation that is essential for the spiritual path.

To think that we can finally get it all together is unrealistic.  To seek for some lasting security is futile.  To undo our very ancient and very stuck habitual patterns of mind requires that we begin to turn around some of our most basic assumptions.   Believing in a solid, separate self, continuing to seek pleasure and avoid pain, thinking that someone “out there” is to blame for our pain one has to get totally fed up with these ways of thinking.  One has to give up hope that this way of thinking will bring us satisfaction.  Suffering begins to dissolve when we can question the belief or the hope that there is anywhere to hide.

Hopelessness means that we no longer have the spirit for holding our trip together.  We may still want to hold our trip together.  We long to have some reliable, comfortable ground under our feet, but we’ve tried a thousand ways to hide and a thousand ways to tie up all the loose ends, and ground just keeps moving under us.  Trying to get lasting security teaches us a lot, because if we never try to do it, we never notice that it can’t be done.  Turning our minds toward the dharma speeds up the process of discovery.  At every turn we realize once again that it is completely hopeless we can’t get any ground under our feet.

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The Four Immeasurables are thoughts or meditations which are based on our present worldly existence. They are called “immeasurable” because they extend to all beings, who are immeasurable, and because we create immeasurable positive energy and purify immeasurable negative energy through developing them.

They are also called “the four sublime states” because developing them in our minds makes us like the sublime buddhas, bodhisattvas and arhats who are beyond attachment and aversion.

The four immeasurable thoughts are expressed in the following prayer:

May all sentient beings have happiness and its causes.

May all sentient beings be free of suffering and its causes.

May all sentient beings not be separated from sorrowless bliss.

May all sentient beings abide in equanimity, free of bias, attachment and anger.

By reciting this prayer slowly and sincerely one or more times, and reflecting on its meaning, we can develop a heart of kindness towards all beings.

This week brought me some new insight. My business partner at the Yoga Studio is both a marriage/family counselor and a Yoga Therapist. The philosophy of Yoga therapy falls right in line with my own experience; that the body speaks to us and that we have everything that we need inside of ourselves for our own healing and understanding. This method of Yoga Therapy as taught through Phoenix Rising consists of the therapist putting the practitioner in yoga postures and holding them physically at their edge while they talk about their experience. The experience consists of moving through the physical body, the prana/subtle body, the mind and the emotions. It is completely self-led, the most the therapist says is: “what’s happening now?” and occasionally repeats the last sentence you say, so you can hear yourself clearly.

I decided it would be a fun thing to try. In the session, I picked an issue I wanted to work on, we set an intention, started with a simple meditation to center ourselves, and then she physically put me into postures. The fascinating thing was that I was bringing up intensely detailed memories of my childhood - things I hadn’t thought about since the time they happened. I didn’t bring up any memories of significant or huge events in my life, more simplicity, like the crazy 1975 wallpaper in my mom’s kitchen and walking home from school with my hair swinging in the wind. Memory after memory came up and they were all nice, warm and fuzzy. There was one key thread that strung all of those fabulous memories together - the Mormon church. Every memory had to do with my Mormon family, my Mormon friends, my Mormon way of life. I was left at the end of the session with a lot of insight - realizing that I often long for my own experience currently in the church to feel as real as it did for me as a child. I also realized how profoundly I love what the church provided for me in my life, and how that translates into the disappointment I feel that the gospel is not what I thought it was while growing up. The session was really positive.

Two days later, I trekked to Santa Cruz with a group of moms from my current ward. I haven’t had much of an opportunity to get to know sisters in this ward because we’ve only been here a year, and I’ve been putting more space between myself and the church. Working full time also puts me in the minority, leaving no time for group park days, etc. There was a nice group there, nice kids, beautiful beach. One of the things I love about the church is that it puts me in contact with people I would normally never be friends with. Such was the case yesterday. The other moms brought doritos, I brought wheat thins. The other mom’s are reading Star Magazine, I’m reading A Path With Heart. One mom was complaining about the weather, I was in the water playing with my kids. They all believe that Joseph Smith was a prophet, I don’t. For the most part it doesn’t bother me. I guess I’m glad for feeling of family I have with them, regardless of our differences. Sometimes, it just feels frustrating.

Backtracking to May when Greenfrog (fellow Mormon/Buddhist/Yogi, only labeled for the sake of the story) came to the yoga studio for a photos shoot. It was a very interesting day for me, being able to instantly talk with Greenfrog without having to interpret vocabulary or explain beliefs. The similarities of our backgrounds within the church, our periods with depression, the experiences with yoga, bhakti, meditation, even the books we’ve read lined up so closely. It seemed that there was this shared understanding - just as I felt with members of the church before my disaffection. He would say something and I would nod my head in understanding and vice versa. During this year due to my unique viewpoints of spirituality, I had come to the conclusion that I was on my own. I felt OK about being alone and that realization brought me a lot of peace along with a lot of inner-strength I didn’t know I had. So it was a real surprise and joy to meet Greenfrog through our blogs, and then again in person. Somehow talking to him was very comforting, confirming my own thoughts that I really am indeed sane. We prefaced the photo shoot with meditation, chanting and a short yoga practice. While sitting in meditation it was still and peaceful and powerful. Toward the end when my mind started becoming active again, two things hit me: #1 - imagine what the church would be like if we all put down our to-do lists and simply sat together in being. I can’t imagine anything more profound, it cuts right through to the heart of spirituality. #2 - this is what the pioneers felt like! How wonderful it is to find somebody who shares your experience in spirituality, and practice together. The Mormon terms of Brother and Sister seemed so easily felt in the simple quiet of doing nothing. No wonder the pioneers wanted to create zion and be around like-minded, like-believing people. It feels good.

I’ve always hated the word maturity. It seems a bit arrogant. As I go through my own practice and path though, that word keeps popping up for me, as if it is morphing into something more palatable for me to digest. I look at these experiences and realize that along with change and acceptance comes a maturity within the spiritual realm. For me, part of that maturity is learning not to resist what is right in front of me. Not to label it away, or disown it because of a simple aversion. Not to think that people should be any different than what they are, or that I should recreate my childhood, or that everyone should understand me. Certainly not that the church should hold everything for me now the way that it did through my 9-year old eyes. Finding acceptance for the way things are is helping me continue to grow and learn. Sometimes it’s hard to figure out where to put little pieces of myself, where I will invest it and where I won’t. As I accept the idea of spiritual maturity, I’m having an easier time listening to my instincts and deciding where I want to be.

I am left wondering though, will the dust ever settle?